What To Do When You Re Being Stalked

What To Do When You Re Being Stalked – Stalking can range from unwanted to threatening, and it can affect your mental and physical health. Sinan Saglam/Getty Images

In the age of social media and information overload, it has never been easier to focus on people.

What To Do When You Re Being Stalked

But there is googling, and then there is full stalking. The latter is a violation of personal boundaries, and it bothers you. Whether you’re being stalked by someone you know or a stranger, stalking can have far-reaching effects on your life and the way you see the world.

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Still, there is hope. Even if you feel lonely, there are resources out there for you. We asked two therapists—one of whom is a survivor—how to act, protect yourself, and move on.

Although it can happen to anyone, it is more common in women. Fifteen percent of American women have been (or will be) sexually assaulted in their lifetime, according to a study published in the journal Violence Against Women in 2020.

The hunt doesn’t just come from strangers. About 1 in 7 women have been raped by their partner, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. For men, it’s about 1 in 18.

Stalking covers a wide range of behaviors, from requests for cooperation to actual threats. “A stalker feels entitled to your attention and space,” explains Monica Amorosi, a licensed psychologist in New York. No matter how the stalking manifests – even if it’s flowery – the goal is to gain power and control over yourself.

John Cleese Quote: “when You’re Being Stalked By An Angry Mob With Raspberries, The First

First and foremost, listen to your instincts. “In my personal and professional experience, your personality can save your life,” says Ashley McMann, a licensed counselor in Austin, Texas. “Our gut often hears things that our mind has not yet processed. If you feel in your intuition that something is off and the situation is uncertain, listen to it.”

How do you know if someone is stalking you? Maybe you bumped into the same person or saw the same car everywhere. Or you receive calls from unknown numbers, or from someone who tricks you into communicating, for example by pretending to be in distress. You may have noticed signs of a broken or locked lock, or damage to your home, car or office.

If someone you know is stalking you, McMann says, it could be a red flag if they seem to know about your plans or your life, or show up at places you frequent, send inappropriate gifts, or constantly like if you are your friends. media in unwanted ways.

Stalking can cause intense fear and anxiety. A study published in 2023 in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence found that 91 percent of survivors experience some type of mental disorder. A study found that stalking can affect how you view yourself.

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The effects can also be physical. Touching triggers the fight-or-flight response, disrupting the nervous system, McMann says. “Constantly fearing for your safety makes you worry more, making it difficult for you to focus or concentrate, sleep well and complete daily tasks.” Stress on the nervous system can cause fatigue, muscle tension, mood swings and immune system problems, he adds.

Over time, without relief, the effects can lead to isolation, severe anxiety, fear, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), McMann says.

“Being targeted by a stalker is one of the most terrifying and disturbing feelings. It’s normal to try to fix it or to convince yourself that it’s not happening,” says Amorosi. Persuasion victims often don’t realize how serious things are until they get worse, says a study published in 2023 in the journal Psychosocial Intervention. More importantly, victims often see their ex-partners as less dangerous than strangers, although the opposite is often true, according to a study published in 2022 in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence. It is important to take every suggestion seriously and act quickly.

As uncomfortable as it may be, let those around you know what’s going on. Tell people at home to look after someone or a car, ask your host to refuse gifts, ask employees not to give your schedule or answer questions about you, and rely on friends and family for support. “Share your location on your phone with someone close to you for safety,” says McMann.

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Keep a list of all attempts to reach you. “Screen shots, save and download all kinds of encounters. If you see them near you, take pictures. If they reach others, write them down. Every piece of data helps to build a picture of what they are doing and a harmful, suspicious Way,” says Amorosi. “The more information you can gather. , the better.”

Now would be a good time to increase security on your phone, computer and social media, says Amorosi. “Double check you don’t have any junk apps sharing your location, keep your accounts private, delete anonymous links on social media, turn off the webcam on your computer and share as little private information as possible.”

If your digital environment is secure, check your home and the next car, he adds. You can use the app to monitor your home recording or surveillance devices and use your phone’s Bluetooth to monitor the tracker on your car.

As soon as possible, send a police report and update it regularly with any new attempts by the attacker, says Amorosi. While law enforcement has little to do unless a threat is made, any paper method is useful. Even if you face obstacles, keep pushing. “Don’t let the police ignore you,” says Amorosi. “If they don’t listen to you, write it off and go to another department.”

The Stalking Prevention, Awareness, And Resource Center

Stalking, for many, is a traumatic experience and it takes time to process and heal, McMann says. “I always encourage survivors to seek professional treatment to aid in their recovery. Trauma-focused therapies, such as EMDR, trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy, and somatic therapies can be very effective in treating trauma,” he says.

Calming the nervous system, McMann says, involves deep breathing, meditation, yoga and progressive muscle relaxation.

In general, create a support network around you, says Amorosi. “Work with the domestic violence agency, meet with a case manager, find a victim advocate, and other support services,” he says. The Stalking Prevention, Awareness, and Resource Center also has some great tutorials. “Everyone can recover, but they need help and support as soon as possible.”

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It can be difficult to watch someone you love go through a divorce, financial crisis, a difficult diagnosis or death. Here are seven tips to help … Resources available to students at the Stalker Awareness Event put on by UT Sorority & Fraternity Life and Title IX at the Student Union. Monday, January 31, 2022.

Stalking is a very serious issue that affects approximately 7.5 million people in the United States each year, according to the Stalking Resource Center. College students are at the highest risk of stalking and do not have enough information about what stalking is and how often it happens. It is estimated that 15% of women and 6% of men have been victims during their lifetime.

On the website of the Center for Health, Education and Wellness (CHEW) there is a section on statistics on sexual assault, domestic violence and romantic violence. Because there is ambiguity around the definition of stalking, CHEW provided this university: “Stalking is a form of behavior that makes you feel afraid, afraid, harassed or in danger.”

Other “red flags” also on the website include waiting for the victim, leaving unwanted gifts, stalking or spying, knowing the victim’s schedule, pointing to the victim’s locations and repeatedly calling or texting.

What To Do If Someone Is Stalking You

To detect and prevent stalking, it is important to understand when stalking occurs. While movies or TV shows sometimes portray stalkers as strangers to their victims, she said

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